Archive for the ‘General Nonsense’ Category

TSN’s Tasteless April Fools Joke

April 1, 2011

This is just uncalled for.

We all know that someone with a Severe Concussion and a Broken Neck cannot be skating in full equipment a mere three weeks after the extraordinarily violent incident that nearly took his life and had an entire Province calling the police to demand appropriate justice for attempted murder.

Do you think we’re idiots, TSN? Do you think we’d fall for this?

Wherever Max Pacioretty is, likely in some pastoral setting recuperating with a neckbrace and some coloring books, I hope he and his doctors are demanding a full public apology from those bastards at TSN.

What’s next? You’re going to tell us the Toronto Maple Leafs are still alive for a playoff spot?

For shame!


Scratching Our Heads

March 29, 2011

michael ryder bust

A recently familiar note will appear next to Michael Ryder’s name in the box score for tonight’s game at TD Garden versus the Chicago Blackhawks.

Healthy scratch.

It would seem that Claude Julien and the Bruins have been listening to Mike Milbury of late and that the once seemingly infinite number of chances Ryder has had to prove himself worthy of a spot at forward in the line-up for the team has finally found a limit. Milbury, in a recent NESN broadcast, flew into a mini-rant about the floundering winger and labelled him a “bust” and suggested the team cut bait on the winger at last. Not really a revelation to anyone, of course, except to those whom Ryder’s teasing one-game-in-ten flashes of effort and offensive skill gave hope that he might find a way to finally become a more productive player on the team.

Not the case, however.

The infuriating winger will likely be benched once again tonight in favor of Daniel Paille, himself a healthy scratch for much of the season unless injuries or the youthful indiscretions of Tyler Seguin forced Julien to play him. That, in itself, speaks volumes. A winger being paid $4 Million dollars to score goals sitting on the sidelines in favor of a truly marginal, defensive minded player whom the Buffalo Sabres decided was a “bust” last season. Welcome to true ignominy, Michael. Welcome to total irrelevance.

No one’s wasting any time feeling bad for him, however. He’s had ample opportunity to show he was worth his paycheck. Chance after endless chance to at least show the effort and the desire to compete that we get glances of from time to time. The skill that once potted him 30 goals in the NHL. He’ll probably see some ice at some point before the season ends but it will only be to rest others in preparation for the upcoming playoffs in which, hopefully, he will remain in the press box. Put it this way; If the Bruins are dressing him it will be a sign things have gone horribly wrong.

Even with a bit of garbage time to close things out, however, his totals for 2010-11 will hover somewhere close to the underwhelmning 17 goals, 21 assists and a minus -5 he’s sitting on now (pun intended). Many of those points came in short bursts of surprising productivity which would, just as quickly, dry up and blow away. Pathetic numbers, really, when you consider how much ice time Claude Julien would give him at times earlier in the year, including a good deal of power play time. Pathetic for anyone considered an offensive player in any professional league.

So it certainly appears the curtain will close now (his contract is up after this season) on the Michael Ryder era in Boston without anyone, fans or players or management, understanding the mystery of why the guy could never pull it together. Why there were so many no-shows. Perhaps they knew the truth up in Montreal when they let him go prior to him signing with the Bruins. That he was a bust and always would be.

Hey, even a blind nut finds a squirrel once in a while, right?

Testing 1,2,3

March 22, 2011

Tonight’s visit to the TD Garden by the New Jersey Devils marks the beginning of an important stretch for the Boston Bruins. Three games at home against three surging, hungry hockey teams with post-season aspirations that promise to give you extremely tough games. With the Bruins floundering a bit and looking “too comfortable”, and Claude Julien and others delivering the message that this is unacceptable, it looks like an excellent test for the team. A test of mettle, a test of sack.

As frustrating as it may be at this point of the season, 10 games from the start of the playoffs, the questions remain for the B’s: Who are you going to be, as a team? Which of you, as individuals, are going to elevate your play and emotion? Take things to that next level that Boston fans so desperately crave from their hockey team. They will be there in force for the next three nights, dressed in their black and gold, and their expectations will be high.

What will you show them?

The Devils, tonight, will be no easy start to the test. This is not the New Jersey team that started the season in a total quagmire. Jaques Lemaire has them playing his trademark tight defensive game and they have surged up the standings to within at least an outside chance at the post-season. Seven points out of eighth place might be a realistic long shot but don’t tell the Devils that. They’re 7-3 in their last 10 and ready to continue the hunt until the math says it’s done.

Sound familiar? Like, maybe, the Toronto Maple Leafs? Who pounded you 5-2 just as few nights back?

After that, of course, comes yet another potential Game-of-the-Season match-up with the Montreal Canadiens on Thursday. Now, the story lines behind this one are many and monsterous and I could (and will before the game) write a short novella on the topic but you all know what I’m talking about. It’s not just Chara/Pacioretty. It’s the fact that the Habs made you look silly in that last game up in Montreal. They skated circles around you and beat you so easily it looked like you weren’t even in the same league. It was the beginning of this poorly timed malaise and, surely, remains an embarrassing memory for the team.

Again. What are you going to do about it? You need to show us, as fans, and yourself as players that you can play with this team. That they are not the “bad match-up” that everyone is beginning to say they are. Because you might meet them in the first round of the playoffs and you can’t go into that series with everyone, including the Habs themselves, thinking they have your number.

The Rangers, meanwhile, in here on Saturday, remain near the bottom of the 8 Eastern playoff teams and are as badly in need of points as anyone. To their credit, they have won 4 straight at a critical time of the year, playing like the exact opposite of the Bruins. They also have an impressive 22 wins on the road. So, again, a hungry team in the playoff hunt looking for points and promising to give the Bruins a hell of a game, for sure.

We’ll know a lot more about the intestinal fortitude of the Bruins by Sunday morning (when they will be in Philadelphia preparing to face the Flyers, by the way). There is a lot of heat on the team and the ability of Claude Julien is being questioned a lot in the Boston media in recent days. The character of the team is being questioned. People want answers and these three games at home provide the perfect opportunity for answers.

Like I said, it’s an important stretch.

The question is, do the Bruins know that?

Cooke At It Again

March 20, 2011

Matt Cooke elbows the Rangers’ Ryan McDonough. Watch the slow motion portion later in the video to see the clear, deliberate motion of the chicken wing coming up to target McDonough’s head.

It’s hard to fathom, at this point. What is it that’s missing from this guy’s brain that drives him to continually, again and again, deliberately attempt to injure guys? Better question: Is there a brain in there at all or is it just a a “misplaced, badly malformed, and dyspeptic liver”?

Perhaps it’s time he got into writing poetry.

Methinks he’s going to have some free time coming up to do so.

You Go, Bruce

March 15, 2011

bruce boudreau

G’day, Bruce.

I think I love you.

What’s that, you say? No poofters?

I think that’s also the message you have for the planned gathering of poofters outside of the Bell Centre before tonight’s Canadiens-Capitals game.

For those of you who don’t know, a group of know nothing, whining, prissified douche bag Canadiens fans (wait, is ther another kind?) are planning on staging a protest outside of the Habs’ home rink tonight to demonstrate their distaste for “hockey violence”. Of course, it all stems from the ongoing (overblown) outrage (in Montreal) over Zdeno Chara’s well documented hit on Max Pacioretty.

Washington Capitals coach Bruce Boudreau, well known for his no nonsense approach and (thanks to HBO’s 24/7 show) salty language, has a message for the dandified assemblage.

Fuck off.

“You don’t like it, don’t come to the games.”

“Listen, I don’t want to get into any controversy, but if that was Hal Gill that hit David Krejci, I don’t think there’d be a protest going on here tonight.”

Good god, I could not have said it better myself. The fact that it comes from someone of position and power within the league is just the icing on the cake. It’s about time someone put these preening, cry baby panty wastes in their place, isn’t it?

So you go, Bruce. You tell it like it is, man. One bit of advice, however. Get out of town quickly after the game. The Montreal Police might be out to arrest you for using obscene language after the avalanche of phone calls from Habs’ fans starts coming in.

Meanwhile, a wonderful related post over at Days of Y’Orr today: Get The Fire Extinguishers Ready.

Jesus, I’m starting to enjoy this a little too much, aren’t I?

Tee hee hee.

Cherry’s Solution

March 14, 2011

Props to Grapes for looking at the Chara/Pacioretty situation with clear vision and not the hysteria tinted goggles a lot of the whiners and crybabies in Montreal (and elsewhere) have been using.

Don Cherry on Coach’s Corner, Saturday March 12th:

Skip to 2:12 for a brilliant (and disturbing) montage of video showing just how many times this exact same hit has happened, not a one of which resulted in a player’s suspension.

Couple highlights:

Cherry to Montreal Canadiens chairman Geoff Molson:

“Tell you one thing, Geoff, call all your players together in the dressing room. And you say, ‘How do you feel playing 41 games with the boards in Montreal?’ Worst in the league for injuries. Ask them that instead of going in the paper.”

“Let’s start with your building, your stanchion and turnbuckles are a joke.”

Cherry to Air Canada:

“Air Canada, you should be ashamed of yourself. By the way, where are their corporate headquarters? We know where they are…Montreal.”

Spot. Fucking. On.

Do It Your Way, Go Down Blazin’

December 20, 2010

For those not lucky enough to catch this Saturday night on Hockey Night In Canada and Coach’s Corner, check out DJ Steve Porter‘s awesome Don Cherry Remix.

How about, eh? Frikkin’ beautiful. Of course, it’s doesn’t even come near to the excellence that was the Hockey Rap on Don Cherry’s Rock’Em Sock’Em 5.

Kevin Paul Dupont: Insane

November 11, 2010

It seems like I’ve been reading the Boston Globe’s Kevin Paul Dupont forever. He’s widely regarded as the most well respected hockey journalist in town. The man’s in the Hockey Hall of Fame, for chrissakes. He does say some crazy things however.

I mean barking mad, doo-lally, masturbating in public type stuff.

Good example would be today’s interview on 98.5 The Sports Hub where he’s discussing the return of Marc Savard and Tyler Seguin possibly moving to the wing when that happens. He suggests he’s excited to see what Seguin can do with “16 or 17 minutes” a game and then suggests he’d like to see Tyler on the penalty kill because he sees him picking off all sorts of passes and getting himself “one or two breakaways a game”.

Um. Okay…

Maybe someday, Dupes, yeah. But not now, I don’t think. Those hopeful breakaways, which would surely be less than one or two per game, might be at the expense of your P.K. unit, currently best in the NHL at 90.9 %, giving up another two goals a game.

Tyler Seguin is too raw and too inexperienced. The responsibilities of playing in his own end at the NHL level are going to take him many years to learn and the mistakes he’s going to make, the mistakes he’s already making, in his defensive zone do not need to be highlighted against the best players in the league in a penalty killing situation. The very idea is completely mental. It could shatter whatever confidence he’s building and dramatically hurt the team.

Sorry, KPD. Maybe this particular idea wasn’t HOF quality.

Just saying.

Alive & Kicking

September 8, 2010
Boston Bruins Logo Painting


Ah, September! The summer heat has ended, the nights are cool, the air seems clean and alive. There’s the scent of something in the air and it’s not just the lingering smoke from cars burning in the streets of Montreal.

It’s hockey time again.

The season is approaching. You can feel it in your bones. Like a nasty Dale Hunter slash to the left shin. Maybe slightly more subtle than that but it’s there, for sure.

I know I’ve been a bit absent from HGW for a little while but, then again, so have you, right? It’s hard to stay too preoccupied with the frozen arts when it’s 95 and humid. You’re thinking of the beach, of going on vacation, swimming, fishing, boating. Cookouts, thong bikinis. Midget porn (what? summer means different things to different people). You spend your days sweltering then wondering why you smell like a particularly bad italian sub at day’s end. It can be fun at times but it wears on you. You start to crave icy things.

Then the calendar turns to September 1st or, better yet, Labor Day hits and everything changes.

Time to start thinking Puck again.

Time to start puttin’ on the foil.

In that spirit, let this post serve as the official announcement of the return of HGW to active status. Look for a site overhaul and some new features here, coming soon. I’ve got tickets to next week’s rookie games at the TD Garden against the Islanders, games which will which no doubt feature one Tyler Seguin, so a scouting we shall go.

Here, to get you in the mood, is the training camp roster and schedule for the Boston Bruins.

And, to answer your question, yes, I missed you. Like the desert misses the rain. Like Tom Sizemore misses meth. I missed you all.

Did you miss me?

Oh, and for a bit of a pictorial sampling of what I’ve been up to feel free check out What Ken Did This Summer.

Sunday Sizzle

June 27, 2010

Still a lot going on post-draft, a lot of movement and rumour surrounding the Boston Bruins and other teams around the league. As it happens, I don’t have a boat load of available free time this weekend to go into it like I want to as I’m working hard on a top secret project here at the house that I will gladly share with you folks when the plan comes to fruition.

Meanwhile, a few tidbits:

Vladimir Sobotaka was traded to the St. Louis Blues for Boston University defenseman David Warsofsky. Warsofsky already has some decent College and Team USA credentials and reportedly has some of the puck moving skills the B’s are constantly in search of.

david warsofsky

David Warsofsky, Boston University

The Draft finished up yesterday. The Bruins filled out their card as follows.

  • 2nd Round, 32nd Overall: Jared Knight – C

    Born: Jan. 16, 1992
    Ht.: 5-11; Wt.: 186 Shoots: Right
    2009-10: London (OHL) – 63 GP, 36 G, 21 A, 57 PTS, 39 PIM

  • 2nd Round, 45th Overall: Ryan Spooner – C

    Born: Jan. 30, 1992
    Ht.: 5-10; Wt.: 172 Shoots: Left
    2009-10: Peterborough (OHL) – 47 GP, 19 G, 35 A, 54 PTS, 12 PIM

  • 4th Round, 97 Overall: Craig Cunningham – LW

    Born: Sept. 13, 1990
    Ht.: 5-9; Wt.: 175 Shoots: Right
    2009-10: Vancouver (WHL) – 72 GP, 37 G, 60 A, 97 PTS, 44

  • 5th Round, 135 Overall: Justin Florek – LW

    Born: May 18, 1990
    Ht.: 6-4; Wt.: 194 Shoots: Left
    2009-10: Northern Michigan (CCHA) – 41 GP, 12 G, 23 A, 35 PTS, 22 PIM

  • 6th Round, 165 Overall: Zane Gothberg – G

    Born: Aug. 20, 1992
    Ht.: 6-1; Wt.: 177
    2009-10: Three Rivers Falls HS (Minn.) – 25 GP, 1.84 GAA, .922 SV%

  • 7th Round, 195 Overall: Maxim Chudinov – D

    Born: March 25, 1990
    Ht.: 5-11; Wt.: 187 Shoots: Right
    2009-10: Cherepovets (KHL) – 47 GP, 6 G, 8 A, 14 PTS, 30 PIM

  • 7th Round, 210 Overall: Zach Trotman – D

    Born: Aug. 26, 1990
    Ht.: 6-3; Wt.: 195 Shoots: Right
    2009-10: Lake Superior St. (CCHA): 36 GP, 2 G, 6 A, 8 PTS, 18 PIM

  • Oh, and in case you hadn’t noticed, Tyler Seguin with the number two overall pick. Three centers with the first three picks. Couple wingers a goalie and two d-men taken late. The B’s strength down the middle gets even stronger.

    Rumours continued to swirl around Marc Savard and Tim Thomas, who has reportedly waived his no-trade clause, but no movement as of yet.