Archive for April, 2011

Most Embarrassing Goal Celebration Ever

April 26, 2011

joe thornton overtime winner

As award finalists are being announced, an we have confirmation that Zdeno Chara is a Norris Trophy finalist and Tim Thomas is a Vezina Trophy finalist, the annual HGW Awards are taking shape as well.

Joe Thornton and his man-baby act from last night’s win over the L.A. Kings is the clear leader for the most Embarrassing, Cringeworthy Goal Celebration of the Year.

Maybe all time. Just disturbing to watch. It sends the Sharks to the next round and all I have to say to Joe is, hey, brother, act like you’ve been there before.

I mean, you have once or twice, right?


Do or Die

April 18, 2011

Not a whole lot to say leading into tonight’s Game Three up in Montreal. Fuck all the analysis. Fuck all the complaing and worrying. We all know what’s on the line. Jobs in the organization hang in the balance and an entire city of fans are ready to march on TD Garden with torches if this thing goes down the toilet tonight.

It’s up to the Boston Bruins to do something about it. Now or never.

That means you, Milan Lucic. David Krejci. Nathan Horton. All of you.

Do something.

Chara Hospitalized

April 16, 2011

News this morning that Zdeno Chara spent last night in the hospital for dehydration. Disturbing news for Bruins fans, indeed, heading into the crucial game two tonight at TD Garden of the B’s-Habs first round series with their team down 1-0. Word so far is that he will play but how effective he might be is certainly a relevant question.

The real question, to me, is why? Is he ill? It happened after practice on Friday and one has to wonder, was he not caring for himself properly during practice? Did the training staff drop the ball by not noticing that the player was not up to snuff. Does a guy like him, who logs so many minutes in game action, even need to practice at this point of the season if he’s not completely 100% healthy?

All things we need answers to. The severity of the issue/illness will need to be explained but don’t be surprised if information is short from the Bruins organization itself. Right now it’s a wait and see situation with a nation of Black and Gold fans holding their collective breath.

Game One, You Fuckers

April 14, 2011
zdeno chare montreal canadiens max pacioretty

The Size Difference Between the Bruins and Habs is a Key Factor in the Series

I fucking hate the Montreal Canadiens.

I hate the team, I hate the individual players, I hate the coaches and the management and the ownership. Most of all I hate their snobbish, preening, know-nothing fans with their bent towards screeching hysteria and show tunes. If you need any evidence of this fact, please see the following.

Statement Game

The Ultimate Dive

Arrest Max Pacioretty

Goodbye You Lizard Scum

Sand Trap

Montreal Is Not A Hockey Town

Homerism Gone Wild In Montreal

One Punch Knockout

French Taunting

Frontier Justice

I Have Hate In My Heart

As you can see, I’ve jotted down my feelings about the Bleu, Blanc et Rougettes a couple of times. The Diving Princesses are not well liked around these parts. It has everything to do with the way they play the game and the nose-in-the-air nature of their boorish fans. The idiocy of people who call 911 for a hockey check or set cars on fire for a playoff series win. Who boo other countries national anthems. All of the above.

As such, I hope the Bruins crush them tonight. Run them out of the building. Use superior size and physicality and aggression to hammer them into whimpering submission and send them tail between legs into the Boston night, fearing for their lives. Afraid to return to TD Garden on Saturday for yet another vicious beating.

This is the mandate of the Boston Bruins tonight.

Beat them. Badly. Make it happen.

See you on Twitter for the game. @hockeygonewild.

Once More Unto The Breach

April 10, 2011

“From Hell’s Heart I Stab At Thee”

    – Captain Ahab

The Boston Bruins will once again face the Montreal Canadiens in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. In some ways it will be more of the same intense rivalry we have seen in the past. In some ways it will be completely different. The shadow of the Zdeno Chara – Max Pacioretty incident will hang over the entire proceedings like some monstrous pall of bloated idiocy thanks to the actions of the hysterical, whining fan base of the Bleu, Blanc et Rougettes.

Let me make that clear. It will be no fault of the Boston Bruins or their fan base that this series might immediately descend into a complete mockery of the sport we all love.

I’ll predict it right now.

The Habs’ fans won’t be able to handle this. They won’t be able to act like actual hockey fans. They’ve already proven that they don’t have that ability. We all saw it. We know about the 911 calls. We saw the protests. We’ve read enough high pitched preening whines in various forums and in the comments sections of TSN articles. It’s there for all to see and everyone outside of Quebec Province knows it for what it is.

The Montreal Canadiens team, organization and it’s fans are the biggest bunch of utter pussies that have ever walked into a hockey rink. Period.

And that includes Max Pacioretty, folks.

Once again, starting this Thursday, they will show us all how true that statement is.

More on this topic soon, as you might expect.

Winding Down, Gearing Up

April 8, 2011

This is an odd part of the season. Finishing up the regular season schedule whilst waiting for the Playoffs to begin can be a tedious excercise for both fans and teams when your position in the post-season is secured and pretty much set. The Boston Bruins are in danger of falling into cruise mode because of the seeming insignificance of the remaining games. New York Islanders? Ottawa Senators? New Jersey Devils?
Teams full of guys scheduling golf vacations.

It’s dangerous because it can lure a team into a malaise at the most important time of the year. All indications were that the Bruins were gearing up at the right time and then the two recent New York games seemed to show a team getting sleepy at the wheel. We all know what happened after the 1st period of that game at MSG. It was all too hauntingly familiar to what happened last season in Philadelphia, wasn’t it? Up 3-0 and you go to sleep as if the game is won. Meanwhile, an emotional, tough team gets on it’s horse and never gives up and ends up beating you silly.

It was one of the themes of the Boston Bruins’ 2009-2010 season and I mentioned it frequently here. It’s like the team can’t handle it’s own success. It gets complacent. That’s what allows teams to come back from 3-0 against you.

Seems to me it starts with the best players. Tell me what the top scoring line of Milan Lucic, David Krejci and Nathan Horton have done since the team clinched a playoff spot? Do they, more than any other players on the team, look like they’re going through the motions? Against the Islanders it seemed like they were skating in a practice scrimmage at Ristuccia. Non factors. If it wasn’t for the spark shown by the fourth line of Shawn Thornton, Gregory Campbell and Daniel Paille, you would have lost that game.

Not really the signs you want to see from your team. Let’s hope that higher gear is still there and will be in motion next Thursday when the playoffs actually start. If not, there may be some truly hopeless Bruins’ fans wandering the streets outside TD Garden like the living dead. Again.

A few more notes on the end of the season.

  • It looks more and more with each passing day that the Montreal Canadiens will be the opponent in the first round. Can you imagine it? Can you picture the epic insanity of that? Apocalypse Now, folks. 2012 is here. World War III. Throngs of marching protesters in Montreal. Max Pacioretty potentially being in uniform to face Zdeno Chara. Total madness. I’m drooling already. Prepare for posts every hour on the hour during that series, people. This is what we live for.
  • This Saturday Mark Recchi will pass Chris Chelios for 4th All Time on the NHL’s games played list. The three guys ahead of him are Gordie Howe, Mark Messier and Ron Francis. Hallowed company and a monumental achievement by the gentleman. He will be honored accordingly one would think during the team’s final home game of the regular season.
  • The Bruins yesterday signed free agent college forward Carter Camper from Miami (of Ohio) University. A smallish forward at 5′-11″ and 173 lbs he was nonetheless an explosive scorer with 183 points (69-114-183) in 156 games in his college career. He’s a 2011 Hobey Baker Award finalist and will report to the Providence Bruins. An interesting addition and a great hockey name.
  • Steven Kampfer has been assigned to Providence leaving Shane Hnidy as the B’s 7th defenseman. He could return before the playoffs begin along with other possible depth players as the P-Bruins season will end without a trip to the Calder Cup Playoffs.
  • The Clincher

    April 2, 2011

    michael ryder penalty shot goal

    Do I have to take back everything I’ve said about Michael Ryder now?

    Maybe not. However. His penalty shot goal in the third period of today’s game against the Atlanta Thrashers at TD Garden gave the Bruins not only a 3-2 victory but sealed the Northeast Division title for his team. Not a bad afternoon’s work for the Newfoundland native who had, until Shawn Thornton took 40 stiches to the head, been looking like his stat lines for games would include more DNP’s than GWG’s.

    All in all, it wasn’t the most exciting matinee the Garden crowd will see as the Thrashers, technically still alive for a playoff spot before the loss, didn’t show the sort of desperation one might expect from a team in that position. As if in response, the Bruins began the day looking a bit sleepy themselves. The two teams traded goals back and forth and were tied 2-2 in the third when Ryder got hauled down on a breakaway by Johnny Oduya. A penalty shot was justly awarded and Ryder skated in on Ondrej Pavelec and shot high glove, the same move he attempted in the shootout against Toronto the other night. Let’s face it, there is not much deke in Michael Ryder’s game. This time there was some snipe however as the shot was buried in the top corner and the crowd was celebrating. Seven and a half minutes later the game was in the books and so was the Division title.

    The Bruins are fairly well locked into the 3rd spot in the Eastern Conference now and the remaining 4 games will be a matter of keeping guys tuned up and rested for what will hopefully be a meaningful post-season run. That and watching to see how the bottom of the Conference playoff spots will settle to see who they might play. It’s all up in the air. Just two points separate Buffalo, Montreal and the Rangers so there’s still time to shuffle the order there. And who know? The B’s might win out down the stretch and pass Washington for the second spot. Even Philly remains in reach.

    The bottom line is that is doesn’t matter now. You’ll have home ice to start the playoffs and you’ll be facing a familiar foe. How it sorts out is almost irrelevant. The B’s seem to have their heads on straight in that they know it’s their own game they need to be focused on and, by all the evidence, they are doing just that.

    Couple of other notes from the game:

  • Brad Marchand was the deserving recipient of the 2011 7th Player Award. It goes to the player who has exceeded all expectations during the season and is voted on by the fans. Given the rookie’s surprising goal scoring and his superior penalty killing abilities, as well as his role as a true pest, it’s no surprise he takes home the 42nd presentation of the award. Nice to hear the old TV38 theme song there for a moment. Ah, memories.
  • The Sheriff Shane Hnidy made his season debut in the game. Out all season with a shoulder injury, the B’s signed him about a month ago as an insurance policy on the blueline and, also, for his leadership ability in the room I think. His reputation as a character guy is well respected in these parts and whether he contributes on the ice in the playoffs or not, his presence will be nothing but positive to the team. Good to see one of the good guys feeling good.
  • B’s now stand at 99 points. If my math is correct they need just one more for a hundred point season.
  • What? Don’t flaunt my genius? Jealously is an ugly emotion, folks.

    TSN’s Tasteless April Fools Joke

    April 1, 2011

    This is just uncalled for.

    We all know that someone with a Severe Concussion and a Broken Neck cannot be skating in full equipment a mere three weeks after the extraordinarily violent incident that nearly took his life and had an entire Province calling the police to demand appropriate justice for attempted murder.

    Do you think we’re idiots, TSN? Do you think we’d fall for this?

    Wherever Max Pacioretty is, likely in some pastoral setting recuperating with a neckbrace and some coloring books, I hope he and his doctors are demanding a full public apology from those bastards at TSN.

    What’s next? You’re going to tell us the Toronto Maple Leafs are still alive for a playoff spot?

    For shame!

    Healthy Scratchawk

    April 1, 2011

    So the Blackhawks’ 6′-8″ 258 pound certified goon John Scott decided to chime in on the Shawn Thornton “chirping” incident during Tuesday’s game at TD Garden where Thornton took a 40 stitch cut to his forehead and was then taunted by one or more of the mongoloids sitting on the Chicago bench as he exited the rink bleeding like a stuck pig. Thornton has suggested that if he finds out who it was he would deal with it accordingly. Hearing this, Scott responded.


    “He said that? That’s fine. He can say what he wants. He’s going after some of our littlest guys on our team to start a fight. He’s trying to challenge (Fernando) Pisani to a fight. What’s that say about him?

    “He’s Mr. Tough Guy and he’s trying to challenge Pisani. If I’m in the lineup, he’s more than welcome to come chirp at me. I’ll kick the shit out of him.”

    Of course, a moment later Scott is also saying that he wouldn’t do that sort of thing, taunt an injured player from the bench as they sought medical attention, suggesting he understands just how classless and dumb some of his own teammates are. We’ve certainly seen from some of the post Cup win shows on the NHL Network following the Hawks in the off-season that teeny bopper Patrick Kane is a guy who might struggle through a junior high school quiz. And when I say struggle, I mean figuring out which end of the pencil to write with.

    Scott again, on taunting an injured guy:

    “I don’t know if I’d do that, Thornton is a stand-up guy.”

    Okay. So then maybe someone on your own team needs the shit kicked out of them, Mr. Scott? You’ll have to do it during practice though, likely, as you’re not seeing much game action lately. You were a healthy scratch on Tuesday (again – for like the 40th time this season) so maybe “chirping” about what happened during the actual game might be outside your limited realm of knowledge.

    I seriously doubt, by the way, that Thornton ever challenged Pisani. Trash talk has it’s time and place and I’m sure a lot of guys do it. The limits to it are based on one’s own sense of ethics, however. Where and when you decide to do it, in which situation, is something that can certainly define your character.

    Apparently there are some Hawks who have none.