Misguided Be Leafs


I’m not sure if this is a joke or not but it seems some of the floundering faithful in Toronto are not yet ready to give up on the farcical notion that the Leafs doomed late season playoff push is over and that, to be honest, it was all a fanboy pipe dream to begin with.

Of course, this is a fan base that nicknames a player Optimus Reim so I shouldn’t be surprised that fantasy is a key element in their daily lives. And you better not hope that James Reimer is a Transformer, Leafs fans, because next season he might morph right back into a Hyundai mini-sedan. Y’know. The kind guys drive in the AHL.

Transformers are crap, anyway. Even the most obscure Shogun Warrior could kick all their asses.

Seriously, is the entire Toronto fan base made up of 9 year old boys, though? Because I’m not sure who else, other than people who take psych meds through an I.V. drip, would have ever thought this team had a chance anyway. Playoffs? Playoffs?!?

You kids would have needed to be wearing your Harry Potter outfits to the game and casting magical spells all over Phil Kessel and Tyler Bozak all season for that to happen. I guess Dion Phaneuf was wearing the One Ring the first half of the season because he was invisible. I’m thinking he might have needed Green Lantern’s ring to actually keep enough goals out of the Leafs’ net to give them any true shot at that 8th playoff spot.

So wouldn’t it be nice if the Bruins could put the final nail in the coffin for all the little tikes tonight? Avenge that recent, aberrant loss in Toronto and send all the wee little boys scurrying for their action figures and Saturday morning cartoons all sobbing and frightened by the Big Bad Playoff Bound Bear. Who owns your 2011 first round pick (sorry, had to throw that in – wouldn’t be a Leafs post without it).

Go, Gaiking The Great! Go Go!


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