There’s A Tom Petty Song

by

It’s called Free Falling.

Not that I’m a huge fan of his music (though I would take a crack at it on Guitar Hero) but it perfectly describes the current state of the Boston Bruins. I’m sure there’s a host of tunes from the Butthole Surfers with titles I could apply here, too, but I don’t want to disturb any of my more sensitive readers.

It’s just an abyss of uselessness the team has fallen into. A team wide malaise without any sort of innoculation one could administer to fight whatever disease it is that makes a formerly proficient, responsible defensive team suddenly turn so inept in it’s own zone that the worst team in the league scores five goals on you with such absolute ease that you wonder if they’ve signed some Voodoo Blood Pact that allows them to channel the 1980’s Edmonton Oilers.

It was that bad in Carolina yesterday. That embarrassing.

Something is deeply, fundamentally wrong with this team right now and I don’t see any answers on the horizon. For example, you can forget about any major trade addition coming in to try and staunch the bleeding. It just can’t be done within the constraints of the salary cap. People around here keep mentioning Ilya Kovalchuk but there are HUGE problems with that. Firstly, there are going to be a lot of teams in the running, teams with more cap space and more willingness to part with young talent and draft picks on an all or nothing rental of this guy. Rumors still suggest there could be a $15 million dollar offer for him on the table from the KHL next season making any deal for him a very risky proposition without a pre-arranged contract extemsion in place. The odds of the Bruins doing that deal are close to non-existant, especially with Peter Chiarelli’s public statements about not wanting to part with that Toronto 1st rounder acquired in the Phil Kessel trade. Kevin Paul Dupont agrees.

The only other deal that could work would be talent for talent to shake things up. Blake Wheeler and a pick to Anaheim for Bobby Ryan. Something like that, maybe. In my dreams.

Small moves aren’t going to cut it. Marc Savard will return on Friday and that’s a good thing but there remains no goal-scoring winger for him to pass to at this time so what can he really do by himself?

And it’s very possible the team he returns to might be in 13th place in the Eastern Conference by then.

People are looking at Claude Julien right now, of course, as his job comes under the microscope. Constant line juggling, no answer on the power play and a lack of consistent effort from the guys on the ice suggesting that players might be “tuning him out” now. I find this hard to believe, hard to understand. I mean, can you go from Jack Adams Award winner to the unemployment line in the space of about 8 months? I just don’t see that as a serious answer but, at this point, as the disappointment snowballs, everything needs to be on the table. Scary times in Boston folks.

Sing it with me.

“I’m Free! Free Falling!”

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5 Responses to “There’s A Tom Petty Song”

  1. Emily Beezwax Says:

    You keep your stupid, filthy hands away from Bobby Ryan. In your dreams indeed.

  2. Ken Socrates Says:

    Alright, alright, put down that machete and relax. It was this sort of talk, I think, that initially put the idea in my head and I’ve been having sweaty nighttime episodes thinking about it ever since. And now that the desperation is setting in, I’m grasping at anything.

    Anyway, I’ve always got lots of other things to do with these stupid, filthy hands that are just as much fun as NHL trades. And even more sticky.

  3. Gonz Says:

    And here I thought the Tom Petty song was going to be “Yer So Bad”.

  4. Ken Socrates Says:

    C’mon, man.

    Don’t do me like that.

  5. Gonz Says:

    Fine. I’ll stop, then.

    You Got Lucky.

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