Aggression Infusion


So I think I’ve figured out a solution for the Bruins current woes. And, no, I don’t mean their profound lack of scoring and their utter futility on the power play. A few bounces and a few more healthy bodies will hopefully sort that out at some point.

No, what I’m talking about is them going five games now without a fight. Not a scrap to be had in the last five contests and that includes games versus hated rivals like the Montreal Canadiens. Games featuring nasty antagonists like Sean Avery. Dance partners aplenty and not a hand raised in anger, not a bit of healthy hatred to unite and inspire the team.

But I’ve found the solution.

And her name is Elizabeth Lambert.

Here she is in action.

Now there’s a chick with some spunk, some fire, a bit of edge. Elizabeth Lambert, a Junior at New Mexico. I know she plays soccer but she’s young and athletic and I don’t think it would be that hard to teach her the basics of hockey, skating, stick handling, etc. The physical part of the game would come naturally to her obviously.

I mean, let’s be honest, this chick would make Bob Probert shit his pants as soon as he lined up against her.

Sign her to a PTO immediately.

I think she has some free time on her hands.


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One Response to “Aggression Infusion”

  1. Gonz Says:

    To heck with the Bruins, I wanna see this girl unleashed on those European football wussies. Those wanks will be pissing themselves while their diving for cover.

    And I do emphasize the word “diving”.

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